the mind ...

The logic of understanding anything is not just mugging things. A very deep study is needed to understand the entire scenario. What exactly is the reason that only few of us are blessed with good reasoning capability or mathematical skills or toppers…
Biologically, its on neurons, the small minuscule of cells that actually, define all the actions that we do, intentionally or unintentionally. The way we feel the touch of hand, smell of barbecue, pain of pinch and all that silly examples that I can think of. Its all about the chemical infrastructure inside our head. That’s very commendable!
But that was inside the head… then where exactly the mind lies…head is a physical thing, in which all these biological and chemical reactions take place, but that is exactly not the place where mind reside. Or I must say, that’s not the mind.
Mind is something more gigantic, unexplored, and not understood. Its something like magnetism, we know it’s existing, we use it, we study it, but no one exactly knows, what it is! Like wise, mind is also such a topic.
On of my classmate gave me this idea of ‘mind’- every action, our body does as the result of reaction in our brain, is either conscious or unconscious. That leads us top two kind of mind. One that counts the facts and assumptions to reach to a result- our conscious mind. And another, which reacts, even when we are sleeping- our unconscious mind.
Exactly! If someone hits me with a ball, it’s my subconscious mind that makes me dug. But at the same time, if I need to solve a question of algebra, I need to use my conscious mind to act. The entire scenario is very muddled. Both the mind is very active, yet not completely able to act. It’s the prime need of a human body to refine the things using both the mind to come up with any kind of conclusion.
For instance; why we see dreams? Its our subconscious mind that works, even when our body takes rest. I never think what to see in my dreams, it just happens. Same is with the case of many minds.
For sure; sometimes or actually often, we dream what we do and think the entire day, but do we always have the same dream, or do we do the same thing every day…probably no ! The idea is very different, this subconscious mind is designed to think when we are not thinking, the whole scenario is very difficult to understand.
All the neurons has some magical and undoubtedly the most complicated structure of anything made by the creator. But yes, every mind works not even in 3 percentage of what it can, but still we have this world…only a man will full potential mind can tell the answer- what exactly is mind !!!
We use it from the day we take birth till we die, even sometimes after that, but we don’t know how it works. Not even science can answer the exact phenomenon on which it works, so use it, enjoy it, don’t try to understand it, how it works…

The local bus!!

The local bus!!

It was the occasion of MahaShivratri Celebration in Bhojpur. Today we were not able too arrange the bikes for the trip, so we thought to take the city bus, we were 7 in total. Eventually the fair of bus was raised from seven rupees to 20 rupees, with an additional feature to drop you one kilometer away from the main temple.
Still, we agreed to go for it, and landed on the near bus stand, waited for 15 minutes and caught a local bus to bhojpur. Had the trip completed in three hours and returned back.
The local bus was having a capacity of 62 passenger( I know this because, I got the last seat in the bus…). But the festival made a magic in the bus, the total number of passenger in the bus were minimum 95 or even can be more. The scene was very clear from the last seat… in a last row of five, we seven adjusted ourselves. In the front of mine seat, was a lady with her husband and two girls, sitting in a seat of two( thank god, the had a small baby…). And the rest of the seats are hardly visible due to the rush in the bus.
Moving rightwards, may be two or three were sharing the seats, I cant see them, because couples of big sized butts were in the way. The space in between the two side rows of seat was no more a space, it turned into a queue of more then twenty five of passenger in line. Boys, girls, ladies, gents, kids, oldies etc , everyone was pressing each other. Touching ankles, arms, thighs, chest and god knows what. It was a complete fuddled situation.
Needless to tell that, the weight of bus was over the limit, but it rarely bothered the driver. Obviously, the passenger were paying double the charges, complaining least, gathered in large numbers- what more a bus owner want on festival day. The feast of money on a holy day…but is that humane?
For instance, if the bus had imbalanced, it could have cased havoc, a death of at least hundreds of us. Thank god it didn’t happen, but even in hell, if that bad dream become truth for even any one of us, then?
In India, I think in every year we hear half a dozen of news of road accidents of pilgrims. For sure it does not stop the sacred people to go, or the pilgrims to stop climbing thousands of feet’s to get a glimpses of the rock, we worship as our God. But this kind of local bus, can make us very very close to the lord, I mean very close…
Every big city has there local way of public transport, Delhi, Mumbai, Indore, Bhopal, Kolkata etc – city bus serves the most of them…it’s the local public as well as the bus owner and also the government, that someday a small mistake can take away many life in a flash…it’s a very unsure world, risk is in every part, but why to make things bitter…local bus is not a place to kill people, and nor should we make it one.
Reaching a destination half hour late is very profitable the never reaching there. Misfortune can turn in our path any time, thing before rushing you and overloading the local bus…you never know- when u can get crushed!

Xperiance with Hexaware

Hello !

My fourth attempt for a campus!
It was 4/02/2010 an close campus in our college, the company was- HEXAWARE technology, a Mumbai based Indian company, which stands at fifth rank in IT industry in India, at that point of time.
The campus had three rounds ( which later on changed in four ), an aptitude plus technical written round, GD and HR. we reported there by 9 am in the morning. Since it rained last night, so the temperature perished at least 10 degrees. And it was too cold at morning time. For a good reason, it was always known to everyone that, the Hexaware representatives will never reach in time, but still we reached the college at time, sharp at 9am.
As it was assumed, the HR came at 11 am. Then the introductory seminar was there, given by Mr. Joseph, the HR. It included all kinds of vociferous kind of description about the company and the recruitment policy.

After all that thing, then the written started, 50 question in one hour, the paper was very fine, and I was confident of clearing it, and it did happened. I cleared the written.
In GD round, we were 10 people, and the topic was- “is science a boon or curse”. Every one sitting there started to repeat the same thing again and again, and all were rubbish, there was no sense in the GD round, I was not given a scope to keep my point, I kept myself silent, only because, I don’t wanted to be a part of this unsocial way of keeping my point in the court. Like me, Harsh also kept himself silent, but it was unnoticed by the HR, and we were thrown out of the recruitment procedure. Out of 67, who cleared the written, only 24 were selected from GD round.
My attempt for Hexaware stopped there on. Gaurav, Thakur and Himanshu got selected from my class and on overall, 18 were selected from our college.



I learned one thing, even if people around you are behaving like, animal, you need to take the charge to kick there ass, otherwise, you will be kicked out.

14th feb 2010—GATE 2010

Happy valentine’s day !

Today was the judgment day for most of the engineers who ever dreamed to go for masters. Its GATE 2010.
Mine centre of examination was Jawaharlal Nehru School, Habibganj; just 1.5 kms away from my room. I preferred to go walking. Last night I got indulged in game playing, as a result of which I got to bed 4 hours late; and derivative, I woke up at 8 in the morning. And the exam was to be started from 9:30, it may sound plenty of time at a flash, but I need to get bath, worship a bit, and at last go for a 30 mins walk.
So it started the same way, I got ready by 8:30 and went on walking towards my exam center. I reached there in time, and got myself in the class. It was Room no-10, in the ground floor of the school premises. It was a normal class room, the window was very unclear, and somehow, the sun raise entered the class room, the paint in the walls were trying to jump out of the wall. The wooden benches were not comfortable to sit. But in all those situation, the feeling of being in a school got evolved from my inside, which cleared all this allegations from my mind.
Elizabet Mam, (I know this name, because the peon once called her.) who was one of the invigilator, looked a very nice and gentle lady, she wore a kanjiwaram saari, with a dusty color sweeter, with a black shawl over it. She reminded me about most of the school day mams. That seriousness in voice and the control over the gesture is phenomenal and only evident in these teachers. She went through all the instructions one by one, from 1st line to the last. I noticed every move of her, the urge to get every thing done right, was very visible in her every act.
The participants- yes, I found most of the students that were in the exam hall were only to sit and waste the three hours of there life. The guy sitting in the next seat to me looked like a genuine idiot. There were three girls in total in my class, one in light green top, one in pink and one in dark magenta kurta. Rest of the class room remained numb for the next 3 hours. I counted on each minute in my clock (which got stopped in the second hour of exam).
In all this beautiful caricature of environment, I was giving my GATE attempt, which took just three hours, nearly 35 questions out of 65, 68 marks attempt out of 100. As soon as the clock strike 12:30, the ORS sheet was taken away and so was my courageous fight with the paper.

At the end I must say, I am very happy with the way, the exam shaped for me, no matter what result comes, I am very satisfied and trilled with my attempts.

And I cant enjoy the success, if I don’t taste the failure.

“I have to risk it…………..it get the biscuit”

My experience with TCS

20 jan 2010, at TIT, Bhopal
Like every BE student I too carry a dream to get associated with a brand company and build a career. Being a IT engineer, one of the Indian IT brands to which I loved to get joined was TCS. Like me there were more then 500 plus IT students along with students from other branches. Even it was a close campus for us, but all the aggregated 8 colleges were made to unite at UIT, for a combined campus.
In the crowd of more then 1000 hungry solider, I was weaponless, and walked myself in the war for the crown of slavery.
I can guarantee, people who will get selected will be either those who are focused to there preparation, or who are in regular practice for performance or the only who are lucky enough to select every answer correctly. I was not in the first two categories, so my future in TCS relies only to my luck.
The written exam was on 22nd and I saw, every one was indulged in reading comprehensions, doings logical reasoning, mugging previous answers from Barron’s and vocabulary. And I was just wasting my time, only because I was unsure of what I was doing there. Few days ago when the news of TCS campus spread like virus, the first question arose in my mind was whether I should be in there or not. Doing job is not in the list of my priority in life, earning only money is not the thing I wish to have. Even if no one aggress with me, but the fact remains the same that our generation people are money oriented other then anything else. And that’s where I want to shift my mind from.
TCS is a dream job for every engineer, but I want to give something back to the society, in place of earning money for my welfare and livelihood.
This all thoughts were creeping in my mind for long time, as a result of which I never thought to take TCS for serious in any sense. I only went through few question papers of last year and kept myself optimistic, that my simple studies of 2 nights and 2 days, will serve me with a 3.15 lacks package in TCS.
But only being optimistic to be lucky, did not help me in any way… I am a consistent scorer in my academics, and more importantly there was no one near to my academicals, but it doesn’t make me fit to enter in TCS. And that’s where everyone else was superior to me, they went to coaching for campus, for CAT, and they have a good hand over vocabulary and reasoning, and I was just not like them. The scores I secured in 3 years of engineering till date was in vein.
My scores can be superlative only if I could have faced the HR in either technical or PI. But I was kicked out in written. I was not sad; I was not in grief, when I was rejected from the top most IT industry in INIDA. I was just feeling pity for, myself, that I not capable to present myself to the person, who could have checked me. I was just not good enough to clear simple exam.
The moral of my experience with TCS(which ended very quickly !) is that numbers in academics are only valuable, if u are able to get a chance to show that.
And this present day campus, they need a clear evidence that u are good enough to face them… so at any cost, I lost this battle…and at any cost I will win the rest.


aniruddhya

Victims are not only those who die!

Quite obvious thing is this, when so ever someone die,. We say – “God bless his soul.” When someone of our friends –family dies, we cry. It’s a fact because some one who is with us is leaving us. This is 2008, India is very troubled from all side due to the terrorist attacks and all that bull shit. Is the person who dies is the only one to suffer, the answer is a bug no. but just give it a thought if some one of your lovely life gets expired in those attack, then?
We, the common people always try to be far away from these things, we are so busy with our life that we don’t keep time to think about this problem, this article is not about terrorism, neither about the person who died, not about the blood. I want to remind the thing that, we are fortunate, very fortunate.
It was early October’08, I was heading towards my room, but I thought to drop my friend, Poonam to her room first. We both were sharing our ideas about career, life, future, flowers, smiling faces and all those beautiful things. We preferred to walk through the pavement instead of taking an auto. I was smiling all around, unaware of the things happening in the other side of my nation.
My room mate gave me a call – “Bhai! Call your brother; I heard that terrorist attacked Delhi, this evening.”(My big bro was working in a private company in Delhi.)in the mid way to Poonam’s room. I stopped, moved not a bit. My body temperature felled many degrees, my hands became cold. My heart beat started to beat at a speed of 100 miles/ minute. I don’t know how to explain those 10 to 20 seconds.
I tried to call my brother in Delhi, trying to call, in the center of the road, I’m calling and he was not picking up the phone, calling again and no replies coming from him Poonam also felt very shocked, but didn’t say anything. (And possibly, how can you react to that situation is a hectic work, but she stood beside me.) After 2 minutes, my brother called back, and the first thing I asked was – “are you fine”
My eyes got wet and I thought to cry at that instance, I felt to fly to Delhi and hug him. It was first time in my entire life that loved to hear him. I got relaxed in few minutes. Poonam was also cool now; she said I prayed fro you and your brother for the entire time. Then I again started to walk to Poonam’s room. It was the horrifying thing I faced ever. That day I felt that its not the person who dies gets the pain,. But its all those who are associated to him also suffer the pain.
I want every one to think if you are a 70 plus old guy, who just lost his son, or a pregnant mom just lost his husband, or a father looking at the dead body of his 6 year son studying in school, or a millionaire who lost his family, or a young couple who got separated for ever and ever. I can make you thing a hundreds of such horrifying conditions, but that’s not the point. The point is that what have we done fro those who lost their sons, their husbands, their girls and who so ever. Do they deserve the pain what the felt. I can delete the felling of pain of that day. My brother was alright and enjoying the party, and cried for his well being.
I ask do we do something for those who actually lost something of their own, answer it to your self………

Aniruddhya Baidya

The Simplest Ornament

The old tradition states that- “The simplest thing is the toughest to work out.” Need less to say that it is a truth. When I look around myself, I see bunches of people wearing well designed cloths, living in million dollar mansion and expensive gadgets etc. etc.
Do we ever ask our self the real value these things possess in life; according to me this thing has no value of existence if it can’t serve others. But there is something bestowed to all of us which is free of cost and serves as the priceless tag of prosperity. It’s not our money, neither power but a simple SMILE. The simplicity of a smile is worth millions. When we walk around here and there, sometimes when I see a baby playing, or laughing in innocence I feel-why we don’t?
Yes! That little smile form a baby makes me halt at that place for few minutes. In those few second I feel delighted for that sweet baby. The innocence what children tell is the precious simplest ornament of life. I capture all possible memories of these kinds of incidents.
There is a estimated fact that if a person has a life of 60 years, then out of those 1/3 is spent on sleeping, i.e. 20 years. Then 15-20 years for getting a matured guy, rest few years for family. Then what time do you thing you have given to yourself. That’s a tough question. The answer is that we live without that simple ornament.
There is another believe that says –“a man is as old as he things.” If you are 20 or 30 or 40 or above, don’t tie yourself to the daily routine and become a machine. Take time out to enjoy the simplest ornament, make jokes on yourself, feel the pleasure when you see some one smile, smell flowers, eat more chocolates, and do whatsoever it takes for you to have a beautiful smile on your face.
Smile is of no cost and it spreads the joy in a speed more then a jet plane, and effects more then a nuclear attack. It makes you join more people to your life. That’s the SMILE. So smile often, always look after the reasons to smile………………….



Aniruddhya Baidya

die like a dog !!!!

One noon, I went to visit my friend’s den, 5 kms away from mine. It was monsoon, and the climate was magical. Like every time, this time too I carried a small bag with me to earn some memories for myself. What I saw in the middle of the lane was the dead body of a young street dog. The bones were already out of the flesh, the eyes popped out of the face, the blood turned the color of road into red, and the smell of death was dissolved in air, and no one cared about it. Most probably by 24 hours from that time, any sweeper must have thrown the body to the nearest drain, or the birds and other carnivorous will finish each muscles and bones of his body.
This is a fact, but what was the fault of the dog. It was a dog, it could have been a man or a lady. For a man or a lady, for sure some one would have picked him up from the road, or rushed to the hospital for recovery, but if you are dead on the spot, the story will not be a much different from the dog. Some stranger will get you to nearest health center, or nearest graveyard. Your family will find out the incident in few hours or days, tears and sadness will revel and in few days every one will start there normal routine. They will hardly have any time to cry for you. If I compare both the case, the time a man is remembered is relatively more then a dog, but the ultimate fate is the same. Even after we lost the great entrepreneur Mr. Dhirubhai no one in his organization ever stopped working, the money was still coming, the efforts were on, and it was a matter of time, a living legend turned as an unforgettable past. That was Mr. Ambani, if without his presence, no one was stopped, then what about the normal man ?
Anyone is least bothered about them, and why one should? Doesn’t it sound obstructive that when we face a sudden loss, our time of grief, sorrow and recovery, all are too short. Of course, some of us, do not easily adjust with the situation, but the time make them do it. But still time does it!

I saw myself die

We all have at least one dream that we say and never want to get it happen in real life, this time it was mine. It was early spring of 2007; I was in my home after 2 months or so. When I’m in home I only have few thing to do, eat, T.V., sleeping. That noon was a lazy one for me as always.
At 12:00 pm I watched Rakesh Om Prakash Mehra’s “RANG DE BASANTI.” It is a beautiful movie. On that day only there was a terrorist attack in north India. I had also watched Angelina Jolie’s “A MIGHTY HEART “few days earlier. My mind made a mix vegetable of all the elements from this event and served me that noon.
Rang De Basanti ended at 3 and I went on sleep, I remember the dream crystal clear. I was working as a journalist (as Jolie in A Mighty Heart); with my friends I went to Afghanistan to make a report. There, the condition was too serious; all terrorists were active at that time. I was accompanied by my partner.
We took permission from the Afghanistan government and went on to the action site. We were trespassing the enemy’s border, when some terrorist came to us, and caught hold of us, pressed us to the jeep, holed our collars, took our camera and started shooting the bloody thing. They made us lay down on the ground and started to kick our ass. Rather one of their partner asked to take us to their center, but he other said to shoot us on the site.
Then that guy took out the machine gun hanging on his shoulder and got a grip on the trigger. Started to fire on us, and I got awake, made a creeping sound. Watched me body, me hands, they were as cold as ice. It took me more then half a minute to get to a normal temperature. I was so afraid of that I didn’t slept that very night.
I can still remember that thing clearly, when the bullets got injected in our body, I felt the warmth and fire in it. Rather it was so horrifying, that I felt not to die ever. And I too salute those who die for us, so that we can continue to live our life………………





Aniruddhya Baidya

road side beauty

Road Side Beauty


This was an incident of winter’2007; I was coming back to Bhopal by 6 am bus. It was very cold actually and a stiff environment. It was in Itarsi, I was enjoying my tea with a book in hand. Even though it was 9 at morning, but it was too cold. I was wearing a denim jacket and a muffler. So, one can imagine the pinch of cold evil wind around that time.
Then suddenly I watched through the window, which was very striking; a lady of around 40 approx sitting with her girl (hardly 20) on the dirty pavement along side the rode. The most striking thing was their face; for sure the girl was neither looking as miss universe or something. But one will sure want to see that kind of face in a big screen. Yes! She was indeed a symbol of beauty. Not Cleopatra or Elizabeth, but someone whom you cant deny. But there was a evil fact about that girl, her cloths were dirty and torn, one could see her naked body from outside, hands were covered with mud and dirt, as if she washed herself a decade ago. She looked poor then an beggar, or she was a beggar, I can’t tell. The irony of the condition is that we, the normal people are afraid of getting on to that condition, resulting in our ignorance about their pain.
As soon as I saw that road side beauty, I felt pity on her, then on myself. I realized that its just the matter of fact that you and me are not facing the conditions prevailed to her. We are not been betrayed like her. Fellow beings like her and others often get indulged in crime and wrong thing. Don’t you think we, how often ignore them and act like a moron, are serving them with a reason to fall in the pit of trouble. There are NGO; govt. agencies etc. who are striving to help those road side peoples. There are indeed many funds rose every year to serve those, but do you think those raised funds ever reach the victims, the obvious answer is NO! And we never stop enjoying our part of life.
It’s my prime and simple urge to every individual to make them feel that they are special, special to you, to me and to the world. I have and always will have beautiful face hidden somewhere in my heart and soul. Hope that everyone will face such a beautiful reality, one day........

WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO ARE NOT BEAUTIFUL?

I have just come back to my room from my friend’s den. As a daily affair; today also I was in four wheeler. A journey for 20 minutes or so. A stranger on the next seat to me; very fair, around 18 to 20. Quite a good figure and of course not need to tell that she was physically well structured. But there was a small painful fact about her face.
When I firstly saw her face, on that instance my mind and heart cried –“what the hell!”
And really it was. Indeed she was looking like an alien or a character of “HILLS HAVE EYES” or “WRONG TURN”. Weird and horrifying was the experience, if I need to tell one. Alas! The gift of being fair and good body and may be a good family background (which I believe she has); even those things never got counted as she did not had a face of a normal youngster. It seems to me that she was suffering from GOITER; her muscles around her neck and cheeks seems to get enlarged more then her face. And those black and brown spots even served to this curse. It seems to be full of ugliness. And later I to felt pity for her. I personally don’t know her or actually that was the first and last encounter we had; but those responses that I showed towards her; is that humanity? For the first time I thought not to call myself a evangelist or a philanthropist.

The real idea to tell this incident of mine is to ask everyone just one simple question- If you are having a normal face or body, and you call yourself beautiful- think about those who are not as good looking as you are? Don’t there deserver the appreciation what all gets? Quite often when we see beggar or a burnt guy or a person suffering from malnutrition or someone like that girl we tend to change our path. I know this may not hold up with many of us, but many of us does that, isn’t it!

Being fair or dark, beautiful or ugly (or actually not beautiful) is the creator’s part to play. When I look myself in mirror I find a fatty brown short Indian boy, having nothing good in appearance. As every boy I dream to have a beautiful partner beside me. I know same is the case with every youngster. And I am quite sure that girls too posses the same attribute. Then what about those, who are not a part of anyone’s dream. Like the girl I firstly mentioned in this article. Do they have to live there life with a life time compromise, or a grief of not being normal, or the sadness of being ugly etc. etc. etc.

I never thought of anyone to be my partner who is not beautiful; I commit it. But do you think this kind of thinking will give that person the care and love they deserve. When my friend fights with me; it hurts. Then what about those ugly boy and girl who don’t have friends to fight with. It sounds very harsh on them, but this is what we created. I need not to blame anyone, all are evenly guilty for this. This is our luck that we are gifted with a normal figure, but for them we are the mirror through which they cherish the thing they don’t have. I think like this, we all have our own idea about this but I need to just remind you to ask a question to yourself- “what if you are that ugly girl ?”

Realize what you have and also remember what they lack of; this sense of understanding can built a great difference to our fellow beings. Always keep asking yourself-“WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO ARE NOT BUILT BEAUTIFUL”…………….
Aniruddhya baidya